Spilling over

 

Every statue can crumble

Every wall has cracks

That we try so hard to conceal

Every eye has unshed tears

That well up and flood the heart

Each smile has sadness

Outlining its edges

That we try so hard to rein

Boiling rage beneath

A calm veneer that

We struggle to contain

Yet the cup of forbearance

will flow over some day

When you’ve borne

Life with stoicism

For too long

You’re cries

will echo on

Find a home

Find a home

for your feelings

Give them a cushion

to rest on

A corner to set roots in

Let them meander through

the corridors of your mind

Hold them close

till they seep through

your weary bones

Inhale them in

Till they fill

depths of your soul

Open windows

of your heart to air

feelings that gather dust

and let them fly

Dealing With Uncertainty

We’re forever fighting these battles in our mangled minds where we walk the tightrope walk between knowing and uncertainty. The divide between wanting to know what the future holds or waiting for each day to unfold and taking it head on .I often wonder how would it have been had we known what the future held? If we could see through the tricks and antics that time had up its sleeve? Or if we could unravel the surreptitious glances that the future throws our way ? Would life be any better? I don’t know about  better, but it sure would have been writ large with monotony and have us trapped in the rut of predictability. There would be nothing to wish or hope for and no sense of anticipation for the future to unfold. We’d be weary beings treading through a stagnant existence. That brings us back to how life is now uncertain, ever-changing and ridden with complexities, challenges that unfold each day. Perhaps that really is the essence of life and we’re meant to take the bull by the horns not knowing what direction it’ll take tomorrow. Perhaps life is all about dealing with uncertainty and insecurities and overcoming these determines how we grow and mature as individuals. Because comfort and predictability are but a trap that can ensnare our hopes and dreams and keep us rooted in stagnation. While uncertainty asks of us to bend, twist and change with circumstances which is what keeps us moving with life and staying flexible. Taking on and relishing each new experience, experimenting with things we’d never fathomed we were capable of enjoying and basically stretching the limits of our minds and perception.

The Gremlin in our mind

We amble

On endlessly

We run with all

We’ve got

We hide

In darker corners

We drown ourselves

In noise

We’ll do anything

It takes to escape

The gremlins

The monsters of our making

The niggling voices

Those swallow us like a vortex

And engulf our shaky beings

Until we

Gather all our might

Bracing up to

Put up a fight

With all it ever takes

And suddenly

The gnarling gremlins

And menacing monsters

Seem to fade into oblivion

Dancing away into darkness

Rocky Road Ahead

The road you chose

Is a lonely one

The Twists and turns are sharp

There are bends and

Boulders lined on the way

You might encounter fellow travellers

Who walk with you a distance

And diverge to make their paths

The road will get rockier

There will be storms to conquer

Don’t look back in nostalgia

Don’t pause in fear

Don’t slow down to withdraw

Just keep walking

Walk till you see the beacon

Walk till you learn to live in the moment

Walk till you know the transience of life

Walk till your darkness melts into light

Life’s Lessons, Longings and Impressions

Life’s unpredictable, unfair and yet a beautiful journey If you have an appetite life has a lot to offer. You just need to open your arms to feel it, experience it in entirety , all joys and sorrows, all hopes all dreams . As I inch towards 30, I have this incessant urge to reflect on all the lessons life’s brought my way, to gather those nuggets and capture them somewhere. Most of my growing up happened in the last decade. Before which I was comfortably sheltered in a cocooned existence. But the past few years shook me out of complacence and forced me to get my hands dirty and learn more about life, about letting go of what I was to become what I could be. To shed my perceptions, biases, to look at life up and close. To learn some more and reflect less. Here’s what I thought I could share in a long self indulgent monologue. You can read it at the risk of falling asleep with such hackneyed, done to death lessons.

  • Travel, stir the wanderlust within. Roam the world, see all you can. Experience all you can. Traveling is the shortest route to discovering what your soul needs and it is what helps you unwind and break monotony like nothing. Travel to rejuvenate yourself and travel to resurrect your relationships with those who matter. Travel with a partner; a companion. Travel alone, travel to quench the thirst for knowledge, to find meaning in life.
  • Read: Books will be your only constant companion in life’s journey. Read when you’re happy. Read when you’re low. Read to know the world and yourself. Read till words dance like images in your mind, read to nourish your mind.
  • Love till it hurts. Love to give unasked, with your entire being. Love yourself, love those who matter. Love your weaknesses, love the darkness in those you love. Love teaches you acceptance and compassion. Don’t stay trapped in hurt, forgive those who hurt you and move on. You can really love another once you’ve accepted yourself, warts and all. Don’t close your heart and mind to possibilities.Keep them open to find love.
  • In the race to make a career, buy a house and acquire all material possessions. Don’t forget the people who matter. Don’t lose yourself to the madness of a rat race. Life boils down to being more than having. Make time for yourself and for others.
  • Don’t stress and sweat over the small stuff. It is best ignored. Think about the bigger picture. There’s no point gathering excess baggage with guilt, resentment, anger. Life’s much more so shed them before it’s too late
  • Make time for your parents. Call them often. They need you more as they age, spend more time talking to them, connecting with them.
  • Take time off from the virtual world. Switch off the phone, that tablet, the laptop. Take a deep breath and have a real conversation with yourself, with a friend, co-worker. Anyone. The virtual world can never replace the physical one.
  • Measure your words; use them with care. You never know when you’d be forced to take them back. Use them to reach out, express, share, but rarely to lash out, hurt. Life is an echo.
  • Retain that child-like curiosity, the eagerness to know and learn something new. Its the best anti-aging solution.
  • Every now and then do some housekeeping of your physical as well mental space. Let go of things you don’t need and have no use of. Let go of relationships that are meaningless and don’t make you happy or teach you anything. The older you get; your world will shrink and will be restricted to the people who really matter.
  • Don’t bend backwards to please people. Or to be someone you aren’t . Sooner or later they’ll see through it. Just be yourself, unabashedly sans apologies. There will be people you meet who may not like you for no real reason; you can’t do a thing to change that. Don’t try and change their perception, they are entitled to it, as you are entitled to your own.
  • Let work give meaning to your life.Put your heart and soul into it. Find a calling that intersects with your passion and work will be fun. But don’t make work a synonym for life.
  • Don’t ever give up on your dreams, your hopes. They define you. Go all out to make them real. Chase them. If they break, find new ones. But never give up on hope. Have your feet firmly rooted in reality, yet give wings to all that you want from life.
  • Never be a naysayer. Be open to change. It can be fearful and intimidating, yet change turns out for the best. Almost. Always.
  • Create something. Learn to draw, write, paint, create a life. It gives you the kind of joy nothing can.
  • Find home. Quell your inner restlessness. Home isn’t necessary a place. It’s a state of being.  A place within which nourishes you, feeds you, give you comfort and strength to face life’s blows. Every now and then look within, retreat to the place you call home and find strength to walk again.
  • Take both praise and criticism with a pinch of salt. Yet learn from them. I used to be an oversensitive person who could cry at the drop of a hat or when I saw people point out mistakes. I am still learning to deal with criticism. Take the lesson but don’t carry  the hurt.
  • Learn to see the people you love as they are and not with rose tinted glasses. Accept their weaknesses and strengths. Learn to see your parents objectively so that your life isn’t a shadow of theirs. Carry the best they taught you; but try and sift out the worst.It comes with growing up.
  • Everything takes time. Dreams will realize, the life you want will come your way. But give it time; don’t be in a hurry to get anywhere.
  • Speak up when it is needed. Speak up when you want to be heard. Silence isn’t always the best alternative. And don’t flinch within while saying no say it politely yet firmly. Most  of us women find it hard to do so.
  • Live in the moment. It is easier said than done. I am prone to fret over the past or keep nursing dreams for the future. It ultimately serves no purpose. So give into the moment and soak in the experience. Don’t focus on making the moment a memory with a photograph or Facebook update. You immortalize it by living it wholly.

I could go on and on and this virtually started to sound like my own wish-list or bucket list of things to do and learn. But for the sake of time and at the risk of sounding like an overzealous preacher, I must stop here. What is that you draw from life ? Do share it.

Tell me….

Tell me

of the darkness

that envelops

our souls

Tell me

of the dreams

and desires

that we buried

in the backyard

of reality

Tell me

of the emptiness

that swallows our core

The helpless ire

that clips our wings

Talk to me

of that

simmering rage

that scathe

our beings like a

forest on fire

Tell me

all that can bring

to the surface

the storms

that brew beneath

the tranquil seas

of our mundane existence