“Dream and give yourself permission to envision a You that you choose to be.”
Ever so often I have noticed people give up dreams, longings and wishes because the significant others in their lives usually parents and spouse don’t approve of them or don’t take them seriously. And we human beings especially women are ever willing to be martyrs to keep peace in the relationships that matter. We choose to just give up the wishes and use others as the convenient excuse for doing so.. It is so convenient to pass on the buck. I wonder why would we do that ? Perhaps in the first place the wishes we harboured or the dreams we nurtured didn’t count enough or didn’t matter as much for us to pursue them till they saw the light of day. Or could it be the fact that we lacked sheer courage and perseverance to see them come to reality . Dreams are not for the cowardly, they need some spunk and a lot of spine. And the courage of our convictions to see them right through despite dissent and opposition. When we give up a dream or passion in the name of pleasing others, a part of us dies within. Gradually as we keep giving up our spirit becomes dull and lifeless sans any passion, sans any purpose. We get stuck in a rut and conveniently blaming others in our life for not letting us do what we really wanted to. The trouble begins to brew when we start expecting others to give up their passions and dreams since we did too.While in the first place if we gave up something supposedly of our own volition why would we coerce another person into doing something similar? Such illogical expectations are the root cause of a storm in most relationships.
Life was never supposed to be easy, and relationships can be anything but simple. With their myriad hues, layers and subtexts. But the bottom line is you can never share or give happiness if you’re not a fulfilled person yourself. So there’s no point letting go of what you want for the happiness of others. Because when you feel thwarted and miserable that is all you would have to offer.
This rant is for all the women including me. It was high time we stopped being martyrs and started reaching out for all that we want, instead of seeking parental approval or approval from a partner. Carpe diem ladies!